This is the key with ALL women and with anyone really. When you spend time with a woman (or anyone else) let her do most of the talking. It should be about 80% (her) vs. 20% (you) and NEVER more than 60% vs. 40%. Learn to live and get comfortable in uncomfortable silences. It will be your best ally with women and in life. Those of you who are great salesmen know what I am talking about here. The human being (especially the eager, attracted man) has developed a desperate urge to fill uncomfortable silences whenever they occur in any way he or she can. The result is that most of what we say and hear to fill uncomfortable silence is useless, senseless chatter.
Most men who find themselves in the presence of the woman they desire are quite desperate to take that opportunity to grab that woman’s attention in ANY WAY he can and at every moment, usually by trying and usually failing to be funny at every turn. And most men usually do this by acting way too zany, stupid and hyped up — Jim Cary on crack comes to mind. I know you’ve been there before my bother. You are in the presence of an attractive woman so you are just there in anguish as you rack your brain to come up with something funny to say or do and your mind is not coming up with anything. Whatever you end up doing is then mostly just goofy-funny if even that and more often just annoying. More
Close your eyes and think of your greatest score to date right now. Put yourself mentally back there. Picture it as best and as clearly as you can how it was from your point of view. Remember EXACTLY how it all felt to you then. Remember how your whole body felt.
Now hold that thought-picture and feeling in your mind for at least 15 uninterrupted seconds. Try it. Use a stopwatch to measure this. Don’t think of anything else but that score for 15 uninterrupted seconds.
You may notice the first few times you try to do this that you won’t be able to even go 15 seconds without your mind wandering onto some other thing. Usually, you will notice that your mind will wander onto things that makes you feel worse or that generally hurt your self-esteem (some past humiliation or some fear of future misfortune). More
This is perhaps THE MOST important thing a guy can remember, especially when he is on a first date with a woman. But it holds true even in long-term relationships.
What the expression means is that you (the man) should be escalating the sexual progression as far as you are willing to go all the way up until she says “no” or “stop” and never before that. Because how you react to the “no” from her is the key to reeling her in and it’s also the key to keeping her interest later. If you act cool and laugh about it when she tells you no, she’s potentially yours forever. On the other hand, if you act pissed off and spiteful when she denies a sexual advance from you, you will drive her away, maybe for good.
I always read different dating gurus repeatedly tell guys that they have to “be confident” when approaching women. This is generally good advice, of course. A confident man is, after all, a huge turn on to a woman. In fact, I would venture to say that a truly confident man who is objectively ugly will virtually ALWAYS do better with the ladies than an insecure, extremely good looking guy. Women actually value confidence over looks instinctually. It has to do with evolution. Women are wired to seek a man capable of protecting them and their potential offspring. A confident ugly dude will generally be better protection than a good looking wimp. So the woman’s nesting DNA tells her to be attracted to the confident ugly man over the good looking insecure one.
A man, on the other hand, is wired in a completely different way. More
1. Always talk less than she does. Especially on the first date or first encounter, but this basically holds for throughout the relationship.
2. Breathe deeply — all the time, but really make sure you are breathing deeply on the first date or first encounter. This compliments #1 nicely. You won’t be witty and fun when you do talk unless you have plenty of oxygen going into your brain. Check on your breathing throughout the day whenever you stop and think about something complex (because that’s when most people stop breathing). Learn about the right way to breathe and how to do it (expanding your stomach not your chest on the inhale). There are many books on this subject. I use a machine Logan from the Future gave me. It shows you what a real deep breath looks like on a screen.
3. Never TRY to be funny when you’re out with a woman. You will come off like an attention-starved clown who’s trying too hard. Just be your normal, serious, relaxed self. Let your humor just come out naturally when something genuinely amuses YOU in the moment — DO NOT FORCE IT. This is the side your closest friends see; it’s why they truly like you. And she will like that person much better than the forced clown most dudes become when trying to be funny for a chick. More
There is a condition I see some guys fall into once they achieve just a bit of success with women — or any kind of success in life, for that matter. You need to know about it, especially if you’re a young potential Mack on the rise. And if you’re headed for fame and fortune, you should also listen up. It’s a condition I call the Frozen Mack-boy. (In a later Trojan Tip, I will discuss the “Frozen Monster-Boy” — a horrendous condition lasting, in certain extreme cases, for decades).
The Frozen Mack-Boy
That’s right, buddy. That’s the challenge for the man with every women he’s dating. Doesn’t matter if you’re married or you’re in a one-nighter. Same principle holds. She’s got to demand that you f__k her. It’s your job to get her so excited and turned on that she INSISTS on being f___d. That’s it, brother. That’s your only allowable sphere of control in Advanced Macking (anything more would be beta territory). And it must be a new seduction EVERY TIME, even if it’s the same woman as the last one. That’s right, the advanced mack treats even his wife of 10 years (or long-time girlfriend) like she’s a hot woman stranger who he must charm, and then seduce anew from zero each time. More
What creates a cool guy? This is important because this is the ONLY kind of guy that can ACTUALLY control a woman. Make no mistake. Women, especially hot ones, WANT to be taken control of by a COOL GUY, and no other kind of guy will do, not rich, not famous, not ANY OTHER KIND OF GUY. And I’m not talking about a bondage type thing or anything illegal, you criminal minded nut! All I’m saying is that women want to a certain extent to be swept off their feet by that super cool guy. They want to be led somewhere they haven’t been, with you, the coolest guy, as a guide and, yes, her Master. But that’s getting into the the May 15th tip. I’m getting ahead of myself. First things first. How does a guy get to be cool in the first place?
The answer is that a guy gets to be cool by being a total geek for a significant portion of his life and then suddenly finding out that what he did during geekdom actually made him cool now. See Bill Gates and practically every geek from your high school, depending on how old you are now. More
Right now is when you should begin.
As a man, having a hot woman take interest in you or, better yet, bang you can be a definite confidence builder for a time. But your underlying confidence in your self can’t just come from that. If that’s all it’s based on, your confidence will ebb and flow with how well that woman treats you. Trust me, it will drive you insane. If your self-esteem is EVER at the mercy of the moods and whims of a woman, you will be doomed to an emotional roller coaster ride that will inevitably destroy you.